Dreams Come True
Discoveries are so cool. Seventeen years ago, I met this woman in a club following an Urban Abstract performance. Well, she didn't notice me but I noticed her and I told my friend Terry, "Bro, that's my wife." He looked at me, chuckled and said, "You are serious!" Now after repeatedly being turned down for several months, I eventually captured her heart.
Now you know that honeymoon phase when you first have butterflies and everything is just love? No arguments, fights, or crazy interactions. Just walks and talks in the park, eating fruit and having healthy conversation. Love Jones and imagining what the rest of your life with this person could be like. Cool right?
Yeah... and then it hits. That moment when you realize, "We have a problem". Your communication is a little off. Well, it's off a lot to be honest. The honeymoon phase is over. She's starting to sound more like a bossy, nagging, loose cannon without any filter. Your feelings are mad hurt but you're trying to be tough and not admit that her tongue is a bit sharp! And then you're re-evaluating, "Hey... is this really the one?" That's when it finally hits: We need a mediator!
For us, we needed a code word which was the mediator or substitute for "Time Out!". Whenever this word was spoken, we equally surrendered and submitted with complete intentions of trying to understand one another.
I mean it was our intention, to get our point across. But every now and then, we needed to table it and come back later or just not say certain things at all. Hey, the Apostle Paul said it this way in 1 Cor 10:23 "All things are lawful for me, but all things are not expedient. All things are lawful for me, but all things edify not."
We agreed whenever the word "unpleasant" was spoken, we would stop whatever we were doing and acknowledge one another's perspective. This one word caused our Winter to turn to Spring and well, you know the rest. That was the time.